Such a beginner

“Until we are carried quite out of our depth, beyond all our own wisdom and resources, we are not more than beginners in the school of faith”. Hudson Taylor said that.

“Out of my depth” is definitely a phrase that I would apply to my life at the moment, particularly in parenting. I am astounded by my self-delusions that I had what it takes to raise THREE children (or even one for that matter). And if I really knew how hard it would be, I wonder if I would have stuck with my career as a humble public servant (nah!).

Maybe this is just end-of-school-holidays-exhaustion, but my own wisdom and resources are certainly depleted. (Strangely enough, I cannot recall one piece of parenting advice that I so thoughtfully gave my parents during my own childhood).

The up-side is that parenting is certainly good for my spiritual walk (which seems more like a toddle at times).

My prayer life is suddenly alive since my 7 year old told me that he had a hard time believing that God really created things by just speaking. His doubts and questions have begun as my need for God’s wisdom, grace and love grows exponentially.

Also, I cannot instruct them to obey God, if I am not doing so. And how can I teach my children about a God whom I don't know? Or love that I don't possess? My faith needs to be authentic before my children will follow.

I am not alone in this. I have recently heard of a mother who is now attending church with her young children, despite being antagonistic towards God for many years. The reason? It was the only place that she could find that would teach her children to be GOOD people (not just nice people).

Avoiding tough times is an all-consuming past-time for many of us, yet they are essential for taking our faith beyond the L-plates.